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19.12.05

APPLES ORANGES


Entering/leaving.


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"Which is better, England or Iran?", is a question that I have rehearsed the answer to yet am no closer in being able to comfortably answer. I am trying out new answers for this, adapting to each audience - never wanting to upset and at times wishing to be reassuring about what it is to live here. Occasionally I become flippant and throw in an outrageous response yet invariably I escape this vague question by replying, "Which is better, apples or oranges?".

"Which is better for education?", "which is better for doing business?", "which is better for healthcare?" - such questions might get more sensible answers. I am always left revising each alternative response after presentation, shocked at the gross generalisations I've left printed in people's minds. I cannot possibly present an objective response and any variation I may present will only serve to mirror my outlook and lifestyle. Being consciously aware of this, my distortions are expanded further still.

"Iran is more dangerous", "Iran is more beautiful", "Iran is more free" - I blurt out with snap-shot reasons and humorous anecdotes. "England is more...", I pause. I can fill this gap with anything - stories and facts can be found somewhere in the almost 28-years of living. 

In truth, there is so much that frustrates me about England, it is natural. There is so much that I'm happy to be away from. I cannot say the same about Iran for I barely feel like a resident, I have asked very little of this country and contributed less. I'm not even sure I feel comfortable with these arbitrary borders, nationalities and cultures that we dice the world up by.

I remarked to a friend the other day that being English is like being a child with a pleasant babysitter that brings the best toys around yet is possibly a little too watchful to make it fun. I went on to say that being Iranian is like having no babysitter at all and doing what ever you want when you want.

Generally I find Iran dangerous, I volunteers this without being asked any questions. Perversly enough there seems to be a little too much freedom you may be surprised to hear and this, for me, invites the danger. When the laws are so easily bought and regulations not present the people don't shy away from trampling on their fellow sister/brother.

"Where would you rather live?", is another question I am occasionally asked. This I am certainly more qualified to answer. My answer is that I don't feel I have a preference but rather more to choose from.

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